In two and a half years, my birth control changed everything about me.
The Mirena IUD, the hormone-releasing intrauterine device, altered both
my body and mind.

In 2.5 years of having the Mirena inside my body (the 52mg Levonorgestrel releasing intrauterine device ), I experienced a total body and mind transformation.

I experienced constant, consistent, and uncontrollable weight gain.
I lost my positive nature.
Negativity and depression became everyday normality.
I started to sleep for hours during the day.

My libido completely evaporated from my system.
Gone. Nonexistent.
I felt broken.

And despite expressing multiple concerns to my doctor, she assured me it could NOT be the Mirena.
In fact, instead, she advised that I take a look at my relationship.
Assuming that was the cause of all my emotional changes.
For 2.5 years, I was blindly held hostage by this device embedded within my body.

It started in October 2013.
I was in a long-term relationship and we wanted an easier, more reliable option for birth control. 
I booked an appointment with an OB/GYN.
We went over my lifestyle/relationship status and discussed the options she felt would work best.
I wasn’t seeking birth control for hormonal help.

Before the insertion of the Mirena IUD, I had no health issues and I was feeling very emotionally stable.

After a quick and nonchalant conversation, she suggested the Mirena 52mg Levonorgestrel IUD was the best option for me.

1) Is over 99% effective at preventing pregnancy for up to 6 years.

2) Your periods will stop - no more bleeding.
Something, unfortunately, promoted in our society as a positive side effect. Spoiler alert- it’s not.

3) It is “low” hormones.
I mean… sure… I guess if you consider 52mg of Levonorgestrel “low”…
( Just for comparison, Plan B has 1.5mg of Levonorgestrel in it. )

4) Worry-free sex if you have a long-term, stable partner.
Let me note: “Worry-free sex” after you get over the excruciating cramps the Mirena IUD causes.
Mine took 9 months to subside. By then, I lost my libido and didn’t want to be touched at all.

At the time before I knew any better - it sounded like the perfect baby-avoiding cocktail and I was hooked.

THE BEGINNING | 10. 31 . 13

I got it placed on Halloween, memorable nightmare ay ;).
I spent that night watching movies on the couch with a heated blanket.
It was an uncomfortable, crampy feeling.
However — not unbearable for having just been implanted with a foreign object.
With the help of Advil, I was practically back to normal for work the next day.

It was after the first 7 days when the cramps actually started to introduce themselves.
Excruciating cramps.

Cramps that knocked me to the ground rendering me useless.
Multiple times while driving my car, I’d have to pull over until the pain would subside.
I’d become dizzy, dazed. It was unlike any type of pain I’d ever experienced.
After a call to the doctor, they re-confirmed that this was normal(?!?!?!?!) and could be expected while the body “adjusts.” 
I was left with the recommendation of heat pads & pain killers.

It took my body around 9 months to adjust and stop the debilitating, excruciating cramps.

1 YEAR IN, GOODBYE SEX DRIVE

After a year, the worst cramps were gone but so was my desire for sex & intimacy.
It seemed as if my cramps disappeared, and so did my sex drive.
I didn't want to touch or be touched.
I had absolutely no desire for intimacy.

Things as normal as watching romance movies and intimate scenes were suddenly making me incredibly uncomfortable and confused.   When you lose your libido (sex drive) it feels pretty horrifying, confusing, and lonesome.
You question everything about yourself.
Convinced there is something wrong with you.
I was convinced it was my problem. That I was broken.

My moods became increasingly worse.
I became more irritable, and more depressed. I was questioning myself constantly.
Why are you like this?
Why can't you just want it?
Why can't you be more like the other girls?
over and over and over. 
I stopped smiling and laughing.
I was sleeping as much as possible so I didn't have to be awake.
I stopped hanging out with friends so I didn’t have to act around them. 

Right photo below : 2014 Approx one year on the Mirena IUD
Left photo below : 2016 6 months after removal.

TWO AND A HALF YEARS WITH MIRENA

It took two separate office visits to convince my doctor to remove the Mirena IUD.
I repeat, two. One too many.
At that time, I just wanted it removed in hopes I’d get my sex drive back.
Sex had become a chore. Something I never wanted to do.

I was desperate to feel normal again.

On my first visit to get it removed, she was not convinced my concerns were directly linked to the IUD.
My doctor actually suggested that the lack of sex drive might be something to look at within my relationship.
I wanted to curl up into a ball and die. Literally.

My depression was hitting an all-time high.
I felt so lost, so confused, and so unheard.
I had someone I loved and trusted at home but was no longer sexually attracted to at all.
My only hope had been that it was somehow being caused by the IUD.

It was only a few short weeks later I made another appointment to get the IUD removed.
I was completely unsure if getting it removed would help.
I wasn’t sure what to expect - if I could expect anything at all.
But my body was screaming for it to come out.

The removal process was quick & fairly painless.

AFTER REMOVAL & SIDE EFFECTS

( Mood improves, libido comes back, dramatic weight & hair loss )

Within just two weeks, I felt my mood begin to improve drastically.
And as if to make up for lost time, my libido came back with a vengeance.

However, more unexpectedly, I started to lose weight dramatically without dieting.
For the first few months, it seemed like I was losing 15+ a month.

In under 12 months, I lost a total of 63lbs putting me back at my starting weight before the Mirena.
On the Mirena, I couldn’t lose weight no matter how hard I tried to diet or how little I tried to eat.
I couldn’t stop gaining.

Another unexpected side effect to the removal of the IUD was hair loss.
Changes from removal of the synthetic hormone in my body created an intense hormonal imbalance, causing my hair to fall out for months. My hair continued to stay very thin and frail for years.

Update as of 2020 : my hair is finally becoming thick and healthy again with the use of supplements & natural hair products.

For almost three years - I struggle to navigate normally in life and to believe the IUD could cause these things.
I never once suspected my depression, brain fog, loss of libido, and weight gain were all being caused by the Mirena IUD.
My (ex) doctor assured me it couldn’t be.

You know your body best.

The best decision I've ever made for myself was getting the Mirena removed.
After multiple discouraging responses from my doctor, I finally realized I was the only one going to advocate for myself.

My body and mind went through an enormous amount of change due to birth control, all of which was denied by my medical system at that time. I continue to worry about the long term effects Levonorgestrel will have on my body and other women’s bodies.

Sharing is Caring.

I would like to recognize that hormonal birth control works different in every women’s body.
There are women who love and use birth control for many many years without issue.
The reason I share is because I was made to believe my birth control was harmless.
When in reality, it was destroying me from the inside.
There is a massive disconnect in the education and awareness around birth control, women’s health, and their bodies.

I was truly made to believe that this was the best thing for my body, when in reality, it brought me years of health problems.

As I’ve started to share my story - the outreach from other women has been overwhelming & emotional.

There are hundreds of women worldwide experiencing similar the same side effects and much worse — while receiving similar medical advice & denial from doctors.